On Embracing Picky

Dear Future Publisher,

I’ve been called picky.

I’ve been told I should lower my standards.

I’ve been told it’ll happen when I least expect it.

I’ve been told that with so many unpublished girls and so few publishers, the odds aren’t in my favour. Continue reading

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On Intimacy

Dear Future Publisher,

The truth is, I’m afraid of intimacy.  I fear the intimacy of opening up to you and sharing my ideas, my innermost thoughts and dreams.  I know there are clues in what I have written, moments when, if I read back what is there, I see myself stripped bare.  I see an honesty I am unaccustomed to in my more measured, controlled interactions with the world.  I am, on some level, an open person – sometimes blunt, often opinionated, always honest, but there is honesty and then there is revealing honesty, and I commit to one but not the other.  I do my darnedest not to lie, but I do not always come out with the whole truth, not, at least, unprovoked, unrequested.  I do not, often, reveal myself.  Certainly not to that woman I passed in the aisle at the grocery store with a bawling child strapped in her cart, or the man in line ahead of me at the post office, the one with the beard and the camouflage hat.  Not to the people I do not know.  Yes, even I close up my deeper self, like all people, away from the judging, searching lights of strangers. Continue reading